The Curse Of Polarization

I loathe polarization. It feels unnatural in a world that’s made up of subtle differences among the glaring ones. “Nothing’s ‘black and white’.” It can’t be. Yet here we are, politically-charged and at each other’s throats because the subtleties of our existence rarely matter, now, when, if you’re at odds with me, you thereby oppose me. And the other way around. There’s that. It’s a “you’re wrong, I’m right” attitude that fails to accept the hard truth that, often, there’s more than one way to define a thing, more than one way to tackle it, more than a single manner in which in might fail. We’ve been brought up to understand this, yet, right now, it’s “my way or the highway”, and- It feels so wrong. Even to someone – someone like me – with his own fringe. It feels childish. Childish to prop up and deify some ideal as prime when, though I might disagree with an alternative, any of a possible variety of alternatives, I discount them for no other reason, perhaps than not being the ideal I espouse on whatever subject, though they’re not inherently wrong nor can I say they aren’t necessarily right but different – just different. But that’s oversimplification of what’s going down, too. Elementally. Because it attempts to define alternatives by any chosen ideal, by its definition, by simply flipping it about and calling them “antitheses” when- Are they? Or do they only differ from one’s espoused belief system by degree, slight or otherwise?

Maybe one of the worst facets of polarization, to me, is how it causes me to go over this shit in my head, rifling through it like I’m hunting for the cure for cancer. When all one needs to do is shut the fuck up, shut off the mind, and listen. Start out by listening. Then look about, take in what you see. Objectively on both accounts. That’s how you reset yourself from having fallen into this kind of hole.

“But, Todd; what are you saying?”

Jesus; I dunno. I’m not second-guessing my opinions on whatever, exactly, nor imploring others to. Then again, I do. I do implore others to embrace my thought process and its product. I think that, when I consider the core of polarizing, though, it- How did we get to be at each other’s throats? Can we come back from that, back to something more sensible and elegant than “you’re with me or against me”? I just don’t know. Because I do begrudge those who take certain stances I’m at odds with, taking them because doing so is the antithesis of what my opposing viewpoint represents. My viewpoint not in general but as it’s completely not theirs. The more I look at it, I see myself in knee-jerk opposition to them. For what better reason than “they must be against me”. This entire stream is exactly why I dislike polarization so. I’m talking about it rather than the meat of what I’m about or whatever concerns me or anything of true import. Any time a discussion of polarization warrants several paragraphs, it’s being fed way too much.

In the last decade, I’ve lost countless friends and alienated too many relatives to think about, as have they, some of ‘em. Had an uncle who dove down the “Q” hole at the beginning and never came out. Our last conversation took place years before he died. It was divisive and bitter and not at all reminiscent of the man I thought I’d known and now- Now, it’s too late. You find yourself thinking, “We’ll get through this, we’ll pull ourselves back together,” but will we? I’ve found myself in several hateful exchanges due to- What. A dead podcaster? Various grifters? My Social Security? A trillionaire? The subject of education? People with blue hair? Interpretations of a founding document that run from a bullseye to a dead miss. Relationship killers, all. Several of these people I have no doubt they’d have pulled my ass out of a burning building and I them, heaven forbid. But something stupid ended up defining our bonds and their breaking? It makes no sense. All I know is that, if we can’t figure out how to buckle down and talk through it, we’ll none of us make it out of this thing. But who of us wants to compromise on his or her ideals? Not me…